How to have gay sex encounters
Gaurav Deka, a trauma informed psychotherapist and coach, told VICE that sexual expression and sexual orientation are at two extreme ends of the spectrum. “It befuddles me because there he is online being the biggest jock I know but then we’re hooking up and he wants me to belittle him and piss in his mouth,” Farhad said. My friend Farhad once hooked up with an internet celebrity who was known to be extremely straight in his carefully crafted online world. It’s mainly arguments over who will do the dishes once you start dating.īut obviously, such situations can be unnerving for some gay men. That’s because, in essence, being gay means more than just performing oral and anal sexual acts. It’s also interesting to note here that these straight men don’t really count sleeping with gay men as cheating on their female partners-an observation made by both, my gay friends and Kort too, who also added how what one is aroused by isn’t necessarily correlated to or attached to their sexual orientation. This is also common on porn websites and sites like OnlyFans where straight pornstars will have a male sex encounter because their gay fans demand it and are willing to pay for it. In several such instances, straight men are even willing to go all the way and try things most gay men would shy away from. It’s not even like the straight dudes are sexually tops only, reclaiming their sexual control in any way. Studies suggest that 10 percent of men who claim to be straight indulge in same-sex activities, which can range from jerking off together to getting pounded by each other like it’s the end of times. If that was the gay agenda all along, some of us didn’t get the memo. But gay men shouldn’t be the ones to comment on how these straight men are ruining their wives’ lives, especially because we never stop fetishising straight film actors and athletes and going out of our way to elaborate how they can destroy our holes. That’s important since there’s a level of gatekeeping within queer spaces, where you have to be so and so and identify as such and such to find yourself being accepted in the bigger community. So what were those encounters?įarhad also believes that other gay men should back off from defining what sexuality bracket these men fall under.
Also, because he very much claims he’s straight to this day. I know for a fact that he’s straight now because when we interact, we don’t delve upon those days of mutual gratification. However, today, my childhood friend is married and has a wife and kid of his own, and he even had a great pre-Covid wedding party. While it was mostly me on the giving end of it, I thought of it as early target practice, since today I am as gay as Easter Sunday. A year later, the jerk-off sessions turned into handjobs, making out, and blowjobs. We obviously didn’t think too much about it. So that’s what we did for almost two years. His mom would be out for work and his younger siblings would still be at school. There, at the age of 14, we would freefall into the murky backalleys of early 2000s internet pornography - the sorts that even after you shut the browser, a pop-up of a woman moaning kept returning on the desktop.īefore we got shunned from the local cyber cafes, we would take our half-hour surfing period to look at images of pink penises and vaginas and excitedly head to my friend’s place after to masturbate together. One of my earliest experiences was chilling with my childhood buddy, playing video games, banging hot wheels into each other, and borrowing 10 rupees from our parents to go surfing at a cyber cafe.